LOL Los Angeles Kings History

The Los Angeles Kings are a hockey team. I don't really know what else to say lol.

Forum Blues

 * The Kings were one of the six expansion teams introduced to the NHL in 1967, their new arena wasn't finished yet so they split home games between two different rinks fora few months until their new home, The Forum was completed.
 * Their inaugural game at the Forum was getting shut out to the Flyers.
 * Since the Western Division was shit for its first year not much can be said good or bad on the Kings finishing in second, as they were knocked out in the first round by the North Stars.The following year they got routed by the Blues.
 * Following the first two seasons, like the other expansion teams not in Pennsylvania, the team suffered with management woes and piss poor attendance.
 * With the arrival of Bob Pulford as head coach, he would rebuild the team leading to a 105-point franchise record in 74-75
 * Going into the first round against the Maple Leafs (and not the dynasty Maple Leafs, the Harold Ballard Maple Leafs), the Kings were heavy favorites.
 * After splitting wins 1-1, the Kings proceeded to get screwed by none other than their owner Jack Kent Cooke, as he didn't want to play a night game and scheduling conflicts led to Game 3 in LA being just one day after Game 2 in Toronto, the Kings lost the series to Jet Lag and having zero days rest.
 * After a few more seasons of playoff failure and nonstop bickering with Cooke, Pulford packed his bags and headed out in 1977. GM Milford would leave as well due to problems with Cooke and the team went back to shit during the 77-78 season.
 * Realizing he didn't give a shit, Cooke decided to sell the team to Jerry Buss in 79, who would go on to become a great owner! ...in basketball.

Three Crowns, No Cups

 * The Kings went into the 80-81 with what was known as the Triple Crown Line of Simmer, Dionne and Taylor. These three led the team to a staggering 99 points and back to the playoffs.
 * Simmer wound up breaking his leg beforehand, this led to a brutal upset at the hands of the Rangers in Round 1
 * The 81-82 season was total shit show for the Kings.
 * Parker McDonald who was promoted to coach that season after the firing of Bob Berry, quit 42 games into the season.
 * McDonald's replacement, Don Perry, immediately got suspended for 6 games for encouraging fights.
 * Even after all this, the Colorado Rockies were shitting the bed even worse, allowing the Kings to get into the playoffs with 63 points.
 * Their opponents in the first round? Only the 111-point Edmonton Oilers with a young and hungry Wayne Gretzky. They needed a miracle to win the series.
 * And a Miracle on Manchester Ave is apparently what they got as they wound up upsetting them in 5! (The Canucks brought them back to Earth the next round but let LA cherish this moment, it's all they had till 2012)
 * Following the miracle, reality struck with 2 seasons of no playoffs followed by the Oilers getting their revenge in 1985.
 * Head coach Pat Quinn, wound up stabbing the Kings in the back after his first and only season with the team. He'd sign with Vancouver with six months on his contract, forcing the Kings to fire him and NHL President Ziegler to ban him from coaching until 1990.
 * Dionne was traded to the Rangers in 1987, he never got his cup. :(

Enter: The Great One

 * Realizing he didn't give a shit either, Jerry Buss sold the team to Bruce McNall, a guy who really gave a shit (but may have too much... see below).
 * On August 9th, 1988, Kings fans would freak, Oilers fans would weep, as the Kings got Wayne Gretzky.
 * Gretzky's arrival made the team the real deal in 88-89. Wasn't enough to get past the Flames.
 * The Oilers got the last laugh the following season by sweeping the Kings in the second round. (1990)
 * But the Oilers weren't done yet! They would eliminate them again the year after that! (1991)
 * Despite Gretzky getting injured early on in the 92-93 season, Luc Robitallie would lead the team valiantly in his absence, the Great One recovered and the Kings made it to the finals.
 * The Canadiens would win in 5 games, last two in OT.
 * The Mighty Ducks of Anaheim were introduced in 1993, giving the Kings a crosstown rival, they would immediately make an impact by finishing ahead of the Kings.
 * But that wouldn't be the only bad news, Bruce McNall apparently had no sense of money management and defaulted on a $90 million Bank of America loan, he was forced to sell the team and sentenced to prison.
 * Jeffery Sudikoff and Joseph Cohen, who bought the team from McNall, shit themselves when they saw how much money McNall was spending on the team and forced the Kings into bankruptcy in 1995.
 * This led to the trading of Gretzky in 96 to the Blues, but that's another story!